December 09, 2013

Don't give up

I've been through some situations that have damaged my confidence. Those situations were at part-time jobs and internships.

When I was 15 years old, I started working at a restaurant. The first 6 months were tough, but fun. Working from 4 p.m. till 3 a.m. and after doing only about 2 tasks for half a year I got bored and wanted to learn something new. Too bad that the manager didn't really wanted to give me the chance to try. After 2 years of doing the same thing every week and working 8 hours straight without breaks, I wasn't really that motivated anymore. Then one of my best friends was in hospital, because she needed a new heart and my mind was a little off at work. The next day, they called me for a talk and they said that I was fired, because my mind was off and I didn't want to learn new things. Which I did, but they didn't want to give me a chance. I was really surprised and really sad, because I didn't really understand what I did wrong.

When you are between the age of 15-17 years old, it's not really hard for adults to hurt you with words. At the time I had that conversation, I was also on my weakest moment because of my friend who had almost lost her live back then. So my confidence had a big dent in it.

I also had some problems at an internship which isn't that long ago. I tried my best to carry out my tasks and actually did a lot for the company. But they started to leave me alone in the office for days and days. I did told my teacher about it, but they thought it was just temporarily. Well it wasn't and at the end of my internship the company didn't want to sign my documents. The company is not longer on the list of internships at our school as they threatened my teacher and didn't give proper accompaniment to students.

I have let this situations hold me back for quite a while. I just crawled in my save shell and I didn't want to come out. Because when you come out and you make mistakes, they are going to fire you or everything goes wrong. But now I finally realize that it doesn't  help and you only feel worse when you don't open up to people. Most of the time it's not you that's the problem, but the company's. Companies want young people, because they are cheaper and they can work for another 2 years and then they can hire new young people.

Now I have a really nice internship where I can be myself and show my qualities and there is always someone to answer my questions. And you know what? They are actually happy with me. So don't worry, everything is going to turn out alright if you just try your best. Just be patient and believe in yourself. I know that it's hard sometimes and you feel like a failure, but you're not! If you really want it, you can achieve it and don't let anyone ever hold you back.


"Remember that confidence comes not from always being right, but from not fearing to be wrong." - unknown



xoxo Anne 




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